The Phase two In the calling
The secret call ended with the revelation of the verse: “And warn your kindred to your clan” (Al-Shu`ara’: 214), So the call entered its second phase, which is the call to prayer out loud only without a fight, It began with the invitation of the relatives of the Messenger of God - may God’s prayers and peace be upon him - from Bani Hashim and Bani Abd al-Muttalib, and this period lasted ten years. Where it extended to the blessed migration.
The invitaion for food ( 54 men)
Where the Messenger of God, may God’s prayers and peace be upon him, moved, and invited his relatives to food, and their number was forty-five from his family and clan; As the invitation to food softens hearts and inspires affection and intimacy.
The first advocacy position of his clan - may God bless him and grant him peace -
In this meeting, and before the Messenger of God, may God’s prayers and peace be upon him, spoke, and before he made it clear to them about his call, a strange thing happened, which was transmitted by Ibn al-Atheer, may God have mercy on him, in his book, Al-Kamil fi Al-Tarikh, where he said: Ja`far bin Abdullah bin Abi Al-Hakam said:
When God revealed to His Messenger: {And warn your kindred to your close relative} [Al-Shu`ara’: 214] It became difficult for him and he was tired of it, so he sat in his home like a sick person, so his aunts came to visit him, and he said: "I did not complain about anything, but God commanded me to warn my nearest relatives" she said to him: So call them, and do not invit Abu Lahab with them, for he will not answer you, so the Prophet, may God bless him and grant him peace, called them, and they came with a group of Banu al-Muttalib ibn Abd Manaf, who were forty-five men, Abu Lahab take initiative and said to him: These are your paternal uncles and cousins, speak and say goodbye to the youth, and know that your people among the Arabs have absolutely no capacity, And if the one who took you has the right to imprison you, your father's sons imprisoned you, and if you continue as you are, it will be easier for them, that the stomachs of the Quraish would leap at you and the Arabs would supply them, I did not see anyone who came to his father's children with more evil than what you brought to them, The Messenger of God, may God’s prayers and peace be upon him, remained silent and did not speak in that gathering,
The second advocacy position of his clan - may God bless him and grant him peace -
Jaafar bin Abdullah bin Abi Al-Hakam said: “Then he called them again and said: Praise be to God, I praise Him, and I seek His help and I believe in Him, and I trust in Him, and I bear witness that there is no god but Allah alone no partner for him, then he said: “Indeed, the pioneer does not lie to his family, and by God, there is no god but Him, I am God’s Messenger to you in particular, and to the people in general, by God, you will die as you sleep, and that you will be resurrected as you awaken, and that you will be held accountable for what you do, for it is heaven for ever and Hell for ever, Abu Talib said: We love your assistance, we are more accepting of your advice, and we most believe in your speech, these are the sons of your father gathered together, but I am one of them, but I am the quickest of them to do what you like, so proceed with what you have been commanded, for by God I will still protect you and prevent you, However, my soul does not allow me to part with the religion of Abdul Muttalib. Abu Lahab said: By God, this is evil, take on his hands before he takes others. Abu Talib said: By God, we will prevent him as long as we remain.
Let's analyze the Prophet's words. - As much as we can.
(Indeed, the pioneer: the one who is at the forefront of his people: his family does not lie)
Why? Because he will lead them in a way, and if they lose the way because of him, they may kill him or, at the very least, harm him. It is a rational speech and gives them a part of reassurance, especially since his nickname in the Jahiliyyah (The Truthful Al-Amin) - may God’s prayers and peace be upon him.
(By God, you will not die as you sleep, and will be resurrected as you awaken)
All speech does not contain talk about God Almighty, there is no talk except for the consequences and their interest, not his interest, My master, the Messenger of God - nor is the interest of God - come - from their worship.
Their reaction
Note: Abu Talib: it's more like to us help you, and we accept your advice, and we strongly believe in your speech, and these are your father’s sons gathered together, but I am one of them, but I am the fastest of them to what you love, go ahead as you are commanded, for by God I will still protect you and prevent you, except that my soul does not obey me in parting from the religion of Abd al-Muttalib, Abu Lahab said: By God, this is evil! Take on his hands before he takes others. Abu Talib said: By God, we will prevent him as long as we remain.
We thus benefit from this part
1 - Calling each tribe in its name is a form of community respect and good citizenship, even if the idea is different.
2 - The beginning of the hadith: a talk about its basic qualities (honesty and trustworthiness) on which no two people in the Quraish disagree, to the extent that they - he prayed that they would trust him for their deposits until he left Mecca - may God bless him and grant him peace - and it is like a clean floor on which we place impersonal demands.
3 - Abu Lahab’s saying: Damn you: and Damn is destruction, so the destruction was on Abu Lahab and not on the Messenger, for speech is entrusted with pronunciation.
That is, what was the linguistic meaning of the word except that it was an insult to the Messenger - may God’s prayers and peace be upon him, and you are an expert that cursing relieves the soul of its severe distress, this is according to modern scientific studies, and this is in the first and last is his uncle, so if people see his uncle do that with him, so, what they do after that.
Related Studies
Signs that your family members are toxic
1- You feel sad and fall around them
2- You feel angry around them
3 - You don't want to go see them
4 - You find yourself having to take care of them
5- You feel drained when you are around them
Others can follow the link below
Another study
Why is a "family wound" so painful
Not only is it especially painful when our family members hurt us, it's actually more painful than when friends hurt us. According to Anita Vangelisti, professor of communication at the University of Texas at Austin, hurt is a feeling of emotional injury that communication can cause. Family harm is particularly painful for several reasons. The Vangelisti study found that people who experienced these types of environments were more dissatisfied with their family relationships.
Recent research takes family harm and alienation to another level. Christina M. Sharp* (Research Professor and Fellow here at Utah State University) I have new research this month in the Annals of the Interpersonal Communication Association that describes how family distancing works in relation to family "black sheep" and family alienation, two chronically stressful outcomes fairly common in United State, We advocate that sometimes distancing is a healthy solution to toxic family relationships marked by abuse and neglect. Family members who are able to keep their distance from each other are often asked about their family situation and encouraged by others to mend their relationships, even if those relationships are unhealthy. This painful question is likely motivated by societal beliefs about the importance of the family and the idea that families are "forever."
We conclude from the two previous studies the followings:
1 - The wisdom of God - the Most High - willed that only one of his paternal uncles would stand in the back of the Messenger of God, who had no money like the others, so Abu Lahab and Abu Jahl were more prestige and wealthier in the Quraysh, until he knows the meaning of reliance on God - the Almighty - and he will not forget him from his calculations - and note that God make this to him and he is his beloved Messenger -
2 - God’s wisdom willed - that the male children of Muhammad - may God bless him and grant him peace - die so that there is no inheritance of prophecy.
The links